In This Issue:

• Welcome to June: Perseverance

• Monthly Devotional: Is God Still Good When Life Is Not?

• Fidelity Focus: Perseverance Through Betrayal

• Ask Ashes Redeemed: "I'm the only one even trying to save our marriage!"

• Editor's Pick: What if the marriage you long for begins with a pen, paper, and a prayer?

• Upcoming June Events

Perseverance

Welcome to June! | by Elise Park

This is the time of year when summer schedules start kicking into gear. If you have children and your family follows a traditional school year, your list of activities probably looks different from how it did last month. Your social calendar starts to reflect later nights out, vacation plans, and potlucks. Your grab bag is likely stocked with sunscreen, bug spray, and band-aids. But for many couples, the regular cycles of arguments don’t seem to have gotten the memo that it’s time for a change.

Are you and your spouse stuck in a cycle of arguing about the same’ol, same’ol? When examining my own life and marriage, I’ve certainly noticed certain patterns or topics always seem to be a hot-button, no matter which season of the year (or of our life!) we’re currently in.

In this month’s issue of Sacred Strength, we’re exploring what perseverance looks like for the Christian woman in the face of marital difficulty. We pray that you’ll be blessed by the devotional and other articles that follow, and that you will find an extra measure of strength and sustenance in this busy and changing season of the year.

Blessings,
Elise Park

Is God Still Good When Life Is Not?

Monthly Devotional & Journal Prompt | By Jennifer Kwiatkowski, CPC, ELI-MP, CWDS

Kristen LaValley says, “Heartbreak has a way of softening the edges in us that need to be softened while sharpening the ones that need to be sharpened. Our response to suffering can increase our capacity for hardship while deepening our empathy for those in pain.”

Experiencing pain is a characteristic of being human. Jesus told us that we would have trouble in this world (John 16:33), so pain should not take us by surprise, nor should it be a reason to shame ourselves or anyone else. We were designed to love, and choosing to love sometimes involves painful circumstances because we are imperfect people who love others imperfectly. Even though Jesus warned us of strife, it doesn’t mean that God wants to make us suffer (because this is masochistic and evil). He does NOT delight in our pain!

Suffering is part of the fall (which is still part of God’s overall plan for His Kingdom). Suffering is not concocted by God to “get us”, force us to choose our alliance, or to punish us. However, God always uses the worst things in our lives for good, whether to teach us a lesson, strengthen us for future events, or to eventually display His glory. What God does with what we experience is always good, even if we don’t have the opportunity to see the good on this side of Heaven.

"Knowing about God" is not enough when times get excruciatingly hard, and "nice theological platitudes" don't help when your heart keeps beating while simultaneously facing with the realization that the rest of your life may be as hard or harder than it is right now. A crisis has a way of forcing our theological hand. You may claim to believe many things about God, but when problems come, how we respond is a much louder statement about what we truly put our trust in rather than what we say we do. Sometimes our theology and circumstances don't fit well together, and we attempt to squish them together with duct tape and twine…and when the tape and string don’t hold, we must take a long, hard look at our theology (which informs our beliefs and actions).

Religion and faith become two very opposite factors when pain enters the scene. In a calm season, our theology may sway towards religion, which relies on traditions, deeds, and repeated phrases to feel “okay”. Yet when times of suffering come, religion tends to turn to dust as true faith rises. In true faith, we rely on a divine living Being that has control of every ounce of every detail that happens in the circumstances that threaten to take us down. However, even if we start with this type of faith before suffering comes, it doesn't mean we will not face, live in, or perhaps even perish by the fire of affliction. But, having saving faith means that we have a God who will prepare us for, walk with us through, and meet us at the end of the distinguished raging flames. Through a horrific experience like walking through fire, we may be more refined, or we may be welcomed home. We do not get to choose the result of the fire, but we do get to decide how we feel about our rescuer, no matter what the rescue looks like.

Some people understand Scripture to mean that if they do everything "right", they won't suffer. I have found that the reality of the inevitable circumstantial pain of living in this world slaps this “I’m in control” notion right in the face and tells it to hit the road. As we all know, good, obedient, faith-filled people suffer hard things (the book of Job is a perfect example). God does not owe us anything, including resolving our complicated circumstances, because after all, He is God and we are not. A healthy relationship with Christ is not transactional, but rather one of trust and reliance.

The following statement may be hard to hear, but have you ever thought about the fact that God doesn’t have to be good to us if He doesn’t want to be? He chooses to be good. He doesn’t have to forgive us… but He does through His son’s sacrifice. His choice to show us intimacy, companionship, and mercy is not required of Him; rather, it pleases Him to treat us this way.

Here is the deal.

Spiritual maturity comes when we face the question: Is God still good even if my circumstances are bad and may never get better? How do we wrestle with a fatal diagnosis, the permanent end of a relationship, the loss of a career, or even worse….the loss of a child?

What if His goodness and His ability to know what is best costs you your comfort, your plans, your dreams, or even your life? Then what?

What do you do when you know God could stop evil because He is ultimately in control, yet doesn’t? Then what?

Obviously, I can’t begin to answer these questions for you, but here is what I did when I faced the same questions:

1. I told Him how I felt.

   I yelled, swore, and cried at Him until I couldn’t cry anymore. And after that, I expected to no longer feel His presence. Yet, during a song, a sunset, or a little child’s laughter, I could still feel a joy that could only be written into the fabric of my soul by the Great Creator. I expected to open up my Bible and read about a situation when someone told God they were mad at Him, and He abandoned or even punished them for their genuine lamenting. I didn’t find that situation. He still loved His discouraged child, even when they couldn’t see His goodness.

2. I focused on eternity.

   I read about no more sorrow and no more pain. I ensured I was secure in my salvation by remembering I had a story to tell about my “before” and “after” meeting Christ. I hadn’t just asked Jesus into my heart and expected “Hell insurance” to be my guarantee to get to Heaven. Instead, Christ came and changed my heart, my actions, and my life. I was still very much a sinner, but deep down I wanted to know Him better and please Him just as much. I wanted to be close to Him for who He was, not for what He could give me. When times were awful, I still came to Him even though I didn’t understand His choices.

3. I contemplated the suffering of Christ.

   I thought about the immeasurable pain that Christ suffered during His crucifixion. Anyone watching, including the disciples, must have wondered about the goodness of God during this horrific event. Many who saw Christ take His final breath and then chose to walk away, dismissing Jesus’ teachings, must have felt that evil had won. The most tragic event in history was endured by the very God who loves me while I’m suffering. He understands. At the same time, He waits to display the ultimate victorious climax to it all; when suffering will end, and we all realize that the most tragic trauma inflicted on Christ was the turning point of the most incredible story of all time.

Friend, I don’t know what you are going through or why this suffering has been allowed to be part of your story, but I do know that I have found substantial peace in believing that God is good, no matter what my circumstances say. I invite you to dig deep in praying for the same revelation, because even if the fire doesn’t stop this side of eternity, you have a Heavenly Father who is with you always, a Father who can’t wait to hold you in His arms while He says, “It is FINISHED”!

Prayer: Lord, it is easy to say “life is hard” when inconveniences come our way. But when tragic circumstances cause us overwhelming pain, we can become skeptical and angry about why “this” has happened to us. We know you said that in the world there will be trouble; after all, you experienced immense trouble which crescendoed into death on the cross. Therefore, knowing that we cannot escape pain, we ask that you show us your presence within the hard parts of life. Be our comfort and Shepherd when we feel we have lost our way. Quiet our fears and help us to remember that you are a good God, no matter what we experience here on Earth. Thank you for being our faithful Father, offering peace and joy even in the pain.

In Your name,

Amen

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Perseverance Through Betrayal

Fidelity Focus | by Elise Park, PCC, CWDS, ELI-MP

The Fidelity Focus article is our take on articles, books, podcasts, and other widely available resources that a woman may encounter as she equips herself in protecting her marriage, her faith and her family.

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

—Galatians 6:9 (NIV)

For many Christian wives, the marriage vow “for better or for worse” is a sacred promise, sealed before God. But what happens when “worse” feels like a betrayal that shatters your heart? Whether it’s infidelity, emotional abandonment, or broken trust, betrayal can test the limits of perseverance in a marriage. As modern women, we face a culture that often urges us to walk away or suppress our pain. Yet, as followers of Christ, we’re called to a different path—one of steadfast faith, forgiveness, and hope.

The Pain of Betrayal

Betrayal in marriage is deeply personal. It can leave you questioning your worth, your vows, and even your faith. The story of Hosea and Gomer in the Old Testament offers a powerful parallel. Despite Gomer’s unfaithfulness, God called Hosea to love her still, reflecting God’s relentless love for His people. While Hosea’s story doesn’t excuse sin or demand blind endurance, it reminds us that perseverance in marriage often mirrors God’s grace toward us.

A Modern Struggle

Today’s Christian wives face unique pressures. Social media showcases curated marriages, making your struggle feel isolating. Friends or secular advice may push you to “move on” rather than persevere. Yet, walking away doesn’t always bring healing, and staying requires immense courage. How do you persevere without losing yourself?

Steps to Persevere with Faith

1. Seek God First: Bring your pain to God in prayer. Psalm 34:18 promises that He is near to the brokenhearted. Journaling your prayers can help you process emotions and hear God’s guidance.

2. Set Healthy Boundaries: Perseverance doesn’t mean tolerating harm. Seek Biblical counseling to establish boundaries that protect your heart while fostering reconciliation, if possible.

3. Find Safe Community: Share your burden with a trusted Christian mentor or small group. Galatians 6:2 encourages us to “carry each other’s burdens,” reminding us we’re not meant to walk alone.

4. Forgive in God’s Timing: Forgiveness is a journey, not a one-time act. Ask God to soften your heart, even as you work through anger or grief.

5. Rebuild with Intention: If reconciliation is pursued, invest in rebuilding trust through open communication, professional support, and shared spiritual practices like praying together.

Consider Tina, a Christian wife who discovered her husband’s affair. Devastated, she wrestled with whether to stay. Despite pressure from nearly everyone in her life to be done with the marriage, she did not feel as though the Lord had released her. Through prayer, counseling, and a supportive community, Tina chose to remain married and persevere through the heart ache. It wasn’t easy—there were tearful nights and honest confrontations—but over time, her husband repented, and they rebuilt a stronger marriage.

“God used our brokenness to teach us grace,” Tina shared. “Perseverance didn’t just save our marriage; it deepened our faith.”

Persevering through betrayal is not about denying pain or pretending all is well. It’s about trusting God’s redemptive power in your marriage. Whether the outcome is restoration or a new chapter, your faithfulness honors Him. As Galatians 6:9 reminds us, the harvest comes if we do not give up.

Reflection Question: What is one step you can take this week to lean on God’s strength in a challenging area of your marriage?

Ask Ashes Redeemed

Ask Ashes Redeemed is our reader's opportunity. to have their anonymously submitted questions answered by our panel of experts.

Submit your question here.

"My husband and I are drifting apart, and I feel like I’m the only one trying to save our marriage. I plan date nights, initiate conversations, and pray constantly, but he seems distant and uninterested. I’m exhausted and losing hope. How do I persevere when I feel so alone?”

Your heart’s ache is real, and your efforts reflect a deep love for your marriage and God’s design for it. Feeling like the only one fighting for your relationship is a heavy burden, especially in a world where social media often portrays effortless romance. At Ashes Redeemed, we see countless women who, like you, are running this race with perseverance, even when they feel alone. The good news? You’re not alone—God is with you, and He equips you to endure with hope.

Drifting apart often happens slowly—busyness, unresolved conflicts, or unmet expectations can create a chasm. As Christian wives, we may feel called to “fix” the marriage, but exhaustion sets in when our efforts seem fruitless. Hebrews 12:1-2 reminds us that perseverance isn’t about running faster or harder on our own strength; it’s about fixing our eyes on Jesus, who sustains us through every step.

Here are some ways to keep going when you feel alone in your marriage:

Rest in God’s Presence: You can’t pour from an empty cup. Spend time in prayer and scripture daily, even if it’s just 10 minutes. Meditate on verses like Isaiah 40:31, which promises renewed strength for those who hope in the Lord.

Focus on Your Growth: Shift some energy from “fixing” your marriage to growing in Christ. Join a Bible study or our Ashes Redeemed support group to nurture your faith and find encouragement from other women.

Initiate Small Connections: Instead of grand gestures, try small, low-pressure ways to connect, like sharing a coffee or asking your husband about his day. Sometimes, small steps spark openness over time.

Seek Wise Counsel: A Christian mentor or counselor can offer perspective and help you discern whether your husband’s distance stems from deeper issues (e.g., stress, depression) that need addressing. Remember: not all help is created equal, and there's usually no lack of people ready to tell you what you "should" do. (See our pocket guide for setting social boundaries here.)

Surrender the Outcome: Perseverance doesn’t mean controlling the result. Pray for your husband and marriage, but release the burden of “saving” it to God. Trust His timing, even when it feels slow.

🌸

Lisa (name changed intentionally), a member of our Ashes Redeemed Community, felt like she was carrying her marriage alone for years, due to her husband’s pornography addiction. Her husband was withdrawn, and she resented being the only one trying. Through prayer and the help of her support group, Lisa committed first to her relationship with God. This gave her the peace of knowing she wasn’t alone while the Lord worked in her husband’s life. Despite his habitual sin, Lisa started inviting her husband to pray with her before bed, trusting the Holy Spirit to move. This was a small step. At first, her husband wasn't interested, but eventually, he did join her. Instead of resenting him for not being the leader she desperately wanted him to be, she allowed the Lord to be her full strength. Over time, Lisa and her husband had greater opportunities to connect through conversations. Her husband did eventually become free from his addiction, and with counseling and support, rebuilt their life together. “I stopped trying to change him and let God work,” Lisa shared. “That’s when things shifted.”

Persevering in a disconnected marriage is a marathon, not a sprint. You may not see change overnight, but every prayer, every act of love, and every moment of surrender plants seeds for God’s redemption. At Ashes Redeemed, we believe no marriage is beyond God’s reach. Keep running, dear sister, with your eyes on Jesus—He’s running with you.

June Editor's Pick

What if the marriage you long for begins with a pen, paper, and a prayer?

Discover a deeper connection with your husband and the Lord through this Christian prayer journal designed to guide you on a 30-Day prayer challenge.

More than just a journal for women, this is a faith-based relationship guide that blends spiritual growth with emotional healing, rooted in God’s Word. Experience more understanding, authentic love, and unshakable faith with each page of this marriage prayer journal.

Crafted especially for the Christian woman who wants to honor God in her marriage, this volume in the Prayer Journeys series invites you to reflect, process emotions, and overcome hidden barriers holding you back from the relationship you desire. Here’s how it supports you every step of the way:

Biblical Insights & Prayer Themes: Daily Bible verses and prayer prompts uplift your spirit, fostering a disciplined and fruitful prayer life as part of this Women’s Devotional.

• Reflection Questions: Thoughtful daily questions inspire awareness of where you are now and where you dream of being in your marriage.
  

• Custom Journaling Prompts: Explore hidden beliefs and thought patterns, unlocking Christian Marriage Help through a methodical, faith-based approach.
  

• Ample Journaling Space: Record your prayers, thoughts, and revelations with plenty of room to write letters to the Lord, doodle, or map out your future plans.
  

• Bonus Pages: Additional space for personal expression makes this a versatile tool for your faith journey.

"As I’ve been going through the “30-Day Marriage Journal”, I’m finding it to be very inciteful and thought-provoking. It’s one of the most helpful journals I’ve ever utilized—packed with scripture and other useful information. I especially like the sections on Limiting Beliefs, Interpretations, and Assumptions. This book is well-done and is challenging me to go deeper in my walk with my Lord and Savior. I highly recommend it to other women." -DB, St. Louis, MO

This isn’t just a journal—it’s a transformative companion for the woman seeking a more loving, faith-filled marriage. Whether you’re processing emotions, identifying obstacles, or dreaming bigger for your relationship, Prayer Journeys: A Woman’s 30-Day Prayer Journal for Her Marriage meets you right where you are. Perfect for wives longing to grow closer to their husbands and God, this women’s devotional is your first step toward the marriage you’ve always wanted.

PS Want to take a Prayer Journey WITH your husband? Get the husband’s edition too!

💁‍♀️Prayer Journeys: A Woman's 30-Day Prayer Journal for Her Marriage (shop here on Amazon)

🤵‍♂️Prayer Journeys: A Man's 30-Day Prayer Journal for His Marriage (shop here on Amazon)

Not an Amazon shopper? No worries! Visit www.books.by/prayer-journeys instead!

Upcoming Events

Faith & Fellowship Calls

In the hustle and bustle of life, finding a moment to pause and connect with others can feel like a rare gift. We invite you to carve out an hour for yourself to join our monthly Faith & Fellowship Call—these sessions are a lifeline for women seeking community, encouragement, and prayer.

These friendly, casual gatherings bring together women at different stages of healing and self-discovery. Whether you're grappling with betrayal or just seeking a safe space to share your story, you're welcome here. Each call is a chance to find solace and strength among those who understand.

We believe in the power of community and how much a supportive environment can mean when navigating difficult times. Our calls with the Ashes Redeemed Community offer a place to build connections and share wisdom with your fellow sisters on this journey.

We'd be delighted to have you join us. To participate simply RSVP inside of our private community and you’ll be able to add the event and call link to your digital calendar.

Not a member yet? No worries! Women are invited to join our private (free) community to participate.

• Tuesday, June 3rd (6PM US Central)